Home Sweet Home

Let me tell you something. I used to think I liked being a loner, but when all you have is yourself, after awhile you want people around. I had plenty of friends back home. Well not that many, but I have never been a quantity kinda person. I’d rather have one terrifically awesome, loyal friend, then a dozen fair weather ones. I miss the lunch dates with one friend that consisted of chinese and walmart. Yes at least once a week we’d get chinese and then roam around Wally world. Doesn’t sound like much, but I really miss it a ton. And I had another friend that has a love of nature like I do. I miss going to the lake, I miss finding pretty rocks to bring home. I have a jar of sea glass, rocks, and drift wood that remind me of her every time I see it. I have yet to make friends down here. Partly because I am wicked shy, and part because I’m afraid to get to know someone and then lose them again. Losing people you love to death is hard but losing someone who is still here but not, if that makes any sense is harder for me. I tend to think about them a lot. Sometimes I guess its good to reminisce, but sometimes its painful. I often think about moving back home, to be where I was happier. But there is a big risk if I go back. If I move, only my youngest child will go with me. The other two are really happy with their dad. Idk if I’d be any happier being back in NY with friends and family, but without two of my babies. Its a lot to think about. One thing I am happy about is that if I do go back I will have a couple of the best friends a girl could ask for. They are the ones who keep me going even though they are so far away from me. Friends are the glue that hold us together when we’re chipped, cracked, or broken, the only thing that keeps us from falling apart. Point of this rant is I miss home. :/ Until later…

~heart & soul~

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