Mini rant

I’ve been trying to figure out where I belong in this massive space and I just don’t know. I try way too hard to keep everyone around me happy and content. The only person being neglected is myself. I’ve been suffering from headaches lately which I’m sure is stress related. I can’t keep up with this charade. If I’m not happy, how can I make anyone else happy? Its not genuine anymore, its become a job that I have to keep up with. I just don’t think I can anymore. I’ve given up things and people because of this and its just pulling me under. I feel like I’m drowning on air. Choking myself more with every single breath I take. When will enough finally be enough? I hope it doesn’t take forever.

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10 responses to “Mini rant

    • I am finding it is almost impossible to take care of myself without creating conflict for others. it’s a bit of a catch-22, and I hate it. I am going to take baby steps and try and get there slowly as to not make too much of a mess behind me.

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      • I understand that concept as well. I’ve had to become very reclusive at times so that I can concentrate on understanding what I need to be able to function. I enjoy being around people and helping when I see opportunity. However, some have taken far too much advantage of my kindness. It becomes difficult to function when I see this type of behavior. It hurts to see some people act the way they do. I wish you the best for your journey. ๐Ÿ™‚

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      • I completely agree, I can’t understand what compels people to be that way. But thank you, I just hope I make it through this journey unscathed. I’d hate to have to change who I am just to avoid being hurt, only time will tell. ๐Ÿ™‚

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  1. I have felt this way too. Sometimes, I get so claustrophobic here in this city.. My spirit screams to leave.. Thing seem overwhelming and you just have to set some boundaries. Nurture your needs.. Love yourself first because, just like you said, if you don’t put you first, you really can’t be there for others. Hang in there pretty girl.. You will get through and breathe again soon.. ~ Jen

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      • It can be hard when you don’t have people you are close to, or connect well with that know you close by to be with.. I went through that when I lived in Salt Lake City. I moved there for college in ’04. But I accomplished a lot because I had lots of time to concentrate on just me. Think of things to do just for you.. Maybe you will find some awesome new things that you really love to do. Just sending some kind words your way doll! ~Jen (hugs)

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      • My biggest issue is I moved to Florida because my ex husband moved and I didn’t want to separate our 3 kids. In moving, I left everything behind, including parts of myself. I’m just having such a hard time, all my friends have been to busy to talk to me. Its been very lonely. I’m trying to do the best for my kids, but I don’t think I can when I’m so down. I really appreciate the kind words, sometimes talking makes it easier for me to think. ๐Ÿ™‚

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      • I’m more than happy to talk with you! I can relate to relocating sweetie!! You know where to find me anytime you need to rant! ๐Ÿ™‚ I really enjoy your blog! I love meeting a great writer!! You will meet new peeps in FL.. it jus takes a lil time… Go spread your wonderfulness!! ~J

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