Pulling the Wool

Pull the wool over my eyes
I’ve seen too much already
Try and hide me from the truth
because the lies are flowing steady

It sounds too true to be good
These words I’ve yet to speak
But they fight to be let free
So I hold my tongue against my cheek

I will hold them in and hold them down
And not allow them to flow free
Because all the bad that I have done
Can never equal the good still left in me

Placing Blame

You can go through life denying you are the problem. Pointing fingers at everyone that sees life through clearer eyes than yours. You can keep putting blame on those that hurt you simply by speaking the truth. It is always easier to say something someone said or did was rude or hurtful, when in reality it was only the truth you never wanted to hear. You can bury yourself in self pity forever, but in the end the truth won’t change, and your denial will only become stronger. Just because you choose not to believe what is right in front of you does not mean it doesn’t exist. It is there, and it is real, and you are missing out on everything that doesn’t conform to your lie.

Fears

I am afraid to lose those that I love
So I stopped feeling love
I am afraid of getting to close
So I keep my distance
I fear death
So I never really live
I fear the unknown
So I never believe
I hate living this lie
So I sugar coat my own truth
I hate my truth
So I keep living my fucking lie
I am afraid of my own fears
So I close my eyes and hide

I’d Be

I’d only be lying to myself if I said that this doesn’t matter if I said I didn’t care
And I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you I wished you were here, not there

I’d be unfaithful to myself if I kept all these things I feel hidden
And I’d be a fool to think that you’d fall for me until I’d finally admit it.

The last time

This is the last tear that falls for you
The last one to pass this lid
The last time I fall for this
Without a net to catch me in
This is the last lie that will ever hurt me
The last one to flow over your lips
The last time I believe your words
Without the taste of poison in your kiss
This is the last word I will have spoken
The last one directed to you
The last time my heart will be broken
While you’re off loving somebody new

Waiting

So I sit here waiting

Waiting for the fall

on this lonely floor of hardwood

as I’m sifting through it all

Looking through the bullshit

Picking apart your lies

seeing beyond that make shift smile

Behind those pretty eyes

Waiting for damnation

To take me from your sins

You are the only battle

I know I could never win

Nor would I ever want to

So I will relive it all

for I know how my heart is

I will just keep waiting for the fall

Discontent

I don’t feel any connection

There’s something not quite right

I feel as if something’s missing

Not sure that it’s worth a fight

I want to know you miss me

I need to know you care

I’d like to see this grow

But you’re never really there

We can be so very close

Yet I feel so far away

I feel as if I am just a moment

I’m not sure if I should stay

I’m quiet out of confusion

And discontent within my heart

I want to be right there with you

But we’re always worlds apart

You say not what you’re thinking

But what you think I want to hear

In turn making this even harder

For me to hold you near

I do not know your intentions

Or if it’s just me and only me

But if you can’t figure this all out

Then please just let me be